Looking for a Spark

In an Old Skirt

I checked in with a friend last week and she replied that she had been “up and down, and round and round.” I agreed. February, and this year so far have been a bit all over the place emotionally.

For one, work has been slow for me, and when things slow down, I can start to feel isolated. Thankfully I have it in me to reach out, to stretch myself out a bit, connect with old-timers and try to meet new people. So, I did just that, I reached out, looking for a spark.

I used to connect to strangers a whole lot during my public relations years. Friends, former colleagues, work acquaintances and even clients would get in touch and tell me they knew someone I should meet. I’ve been introduced to many interesting people over the years, and while most of the time nothing concrete came of these meetings, they always got my mind going and new ideas flowing.

And that’s what I’ve been yearning for.

Sure enough, a friend thought of someone I should know. She made an introduction, and without delay a date was set for a coffee.

This was not a job interview, I wouldn’t even call it networking (ugh), this was the kind of coffee date that carries its own share of expectation, hope and curiosity. It’s its own thing.

I was excited, and then that evergreen question came up: What should I wear?

And that had me thinking, how do I show up, especially now when I am no longer going into an office every day and dressing that part? I used to seamlessly travel through the day in casual yet polished attire. But my wardrobe has changed a bit since those days, and I was flooded with nostalgia. How would I dress today if my career hadn’t changed? I’m a bit older now, I want to carry the weight of my years without losing my youthful spirit.

But those thoughts came and went pretty quickly. How I dress doesn’t really matter, I’m not trying to make any specific impression. I’m just here for the ride, meeting someone new, curious to hear their experience.

On the morning of, and without much thought, I pulled out a skirt I hadn’t worn since before the pandemic, one I loved, and wore to death. It’s a black asymmetrical midi skirt from Bassike, an Australian brand I used to represent. This skirt has been places. It came with me to work, on business trips, to parties, and on vacations. It had a full life until one day I hung it up and stopped wearing it. And it’s just been hanging there for years, quietly waiting, squeezed in with all the skirts.

Putting it back on felt a little like pulling myself out of the rubble. Like a small act of reclaiming something I’d set down without really meaning to. The skirt still fit, still felt like me. And I thought, there she is.

I showed up to that coffee feeling like myself. It wasn’t a performance, or a dressed-up version of me, or even a careful one. Just me, in a skirt I love, meeting someone new, curious, open and ready.

More often than we know, getting dressed isn’t really about the outfit. It’s about showing up as yourself, whoever that is right now, and whoever you’re becoming.

I hope this newsletter sparked something in you.

As always, thank you for reading. If this resonated, I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. Likes, subscriptions, and sharing with a friend truly help Codes of Style grow, and it genuinely keeps me going.

Xx Laurence